Rinoa and the SeeD Ball
by Naomimon
Summary: Rinoa goes to the SeeD ball. Warnings: Yaoi, Rinoa bashing, Tom Cruise bashing and general bad taste.


Once upon a time there was a poor girl who lived in the small town of Timber. She lived with her evil step mother Edea. Well her step mother wasn't really that evil, the girl was just a selfish whiney bitch who didn't always get what she wanted so to her Edea seemed evil. Anyway the girl, who's name is Rinoa by the way, was walking to the mall after stealing Edea's credit card out of her purse. She was off to find a new outfit to wear to the SeeD ball, which she wasn't actually invited to. While at the mall she saw the cutest guy she had ever seen eating with friends in the food court. This wasn't the first time that she had seen this guy. She had been stalking him for three months. She had even dated a guy in the same class to try to get closer to him. Unfortunately she dated his arch enemy, who told everyone she was a slut. So Squall, who is the cute guy as if you didn't already guess, wouldn't give her the time of day. But she knew that he would be at the SeeD ball so that's why she was going. She was going to seduce him. She grinned to herself as she sauntered past his table trying to look alluring but only succeeding in looking like a slutty hooker.

Later that night she put on her new dress, disguising the security tags as broaches. She stole the dresses even though she had Edea's credit card. She has Wynona Ryder syndrome. Anyway I digress, she was on the way to the ball... in the car she stole from the parking lot at the mall. She doesn't smell very nice. She smells like a rotting corpse. What does that have to do with the story? Nothing really I just thought you ought to know that she smells like shit.

Upon arrival she spotted her prey talking to a blond guy with a tattoo on his face. She recognised his friend from the mall and also from her stalking when she would see them having sleep overs at Zell's place. Yeah his friend is Zell, big surprise. She waited until Squall was alone and then she approached him, doing her sexy hooker walk.

"Hey there sexy, want to dance with me?" She asked using her sweetest voice.

"Can't dance." Squall said in his iciest tone, looking away from her.

"I can teach you." Rinoa fluttered her eyelashes.

"Bitch can't you take a hint?" Squall said leaning against the wall.

"Is that a yes or a no?" She asked. God she's thick.

"Look I'm sure you're a nice girl and if you bathed once in a while you could make someone very happy but I'm not interested in you so stop going through my trash." Squall said sipping his drink.

"Oh you're so tall cute and funny, come on let's shake it." Rinoa held her hand in front of his face, "You're going to like me. You're going to like me."

"Alright I've had enough of this freak show." Squall said pushing off from the wall. "Later." He left Slutty McSlut-slut standing by herself looking like a total looser.

"Oh he's so dreamy." Rinoa beamed. She decided to follow him because obviously he was hinting that she should. She basically just heard what she wanted to hear. So when he says, "Leave me alone." she hears "Hey there beautiful why don't you camp out under my window?" Anyway she was following him. He met his 'friend' Zell in the parking lot. They got into a car together and drove off. 'How sweet,' Rinoa thought, 'He's driving his buddy home.' She got into her stolen car and started to follow them. She quickly realised they were in fact heading towards 'Make-out Point'. "Oh he must want to meet me there." Rinoa rationalised. "He must be shy, that's why he bought his friend along." She parked next to Squall's car. She was so excited that she desperately needed to pee. She jumped out the car and ran into the near-by bushes. As she relieved herself on an unsuspecting ant hill she did not notice a foul creature scurry from the darkness and into her car. She returned to her car and waited for Squall to make his move. As she sat waiting she failed to notice the magical dwarf in her back seat. He leaned forward and grabbed Rinoa by the neck.

"What? Who?" Was all Rinoa could manage as he crushed her larynx.

"Tom Cruise is the name and evil's the game baby." Tom cooed into her ear. "In the name of Scientology I need your soul!" Rinoa struggled against him and he pulled a drill out of his magical dwarf robes. "Come now pretty, we're going to have some fun." He started drilling a hole in her head. He pulled her seat back and pushed his little engorged penis into the hole he had created. He fucked her brains until she stoped thrashing around. She died there on Make-out Point being brain fucked by a demented dwarf while Squall made sweet love to Zell in the neighbouring car.

The End.


End file.
